Before I go on, just wanna say this: What's up with everyone, getting love-sick, heart-broken, depressed, and everything else with related to it. I don't wish to go around poking my nose into these matters but if should you feel, even for a second a friend to listen, cry on or seek help, you know who to look for...
Its Hari Raya, festive holiday and I'm up at 6.45am, like a normal working day. Well I'm giving my dad his off by taking his place to drop off my mum at MacRitchie Reservoir. And also going to meet up with an old friend to play tennis.
Got my racket from camp, which was like a ghost town, dropped my mom off and reached queenstown at a super early time of 8am. Road's so clear that it was so amazing. Well turned out that Kaiqing leaves in that cool condo, Queens, which is just a stone's throw from the mrt.
While waiting for her to come down, I threw my stuffs down, laid by the pool and there it began... (May want to skip the next 3 paragraphs, its only for my personal reference, but feel free to carry on.)
The place was so peaceful, gentle ripples seen on the empty pool, a caucasian couple walking their child, the drizzling sound from the water fountain like mother nature's rain, what a beautiful way to start on a day, much less a holiday!
With time and the perfect setting, brings my mind right back on track to where I should be actually focused. I recalled her telling me she lived on the 38th storey, which I counted and it was the highest level! Which means the pent house! Man I've yet to visit one before!
So where do I want to stand in the future? Gave some serious thought about it, about the kind of life I want to lead. The kind of cars I wanna own and drive, the dream homes I want, even down to the specific of design, various furniture I've seen over the years, the lifestyle that would be mine to follow, not like what the Singapore government has successfully inculculated into most Singaporeans.
I don't want to worry about losing my job when I'm near retirement age and then trying to find one; I don't want to shop or dine based on the price tags they carry; I want to travel the world went my body and heart are still fit and healthy; I want to spend more time with friends and family; I don't want to depend on people or make them even the slightest worried about me; I want to live my life to my own expectations and not let others impose theirs onto me, and I believe all this will be part of me.
If you're didn't skip reading this part, I thank you. I will be even more grateful if you should see me someday, when we meet up or whatever, give me some encouragement, don't shoot me down like my parents, and timely reminders will always keep me right back on track for this journey I'm treading is a solo one.
Why? Because I grew up with and am surrounded by people who have wrong mindsets, at least that's in my mind.
Dad: "Singapore is so strict that you cannot make any mistake, not even one."
Mom: "Study hard and get a good education. Then find a high paying employee job."
Sister: My sister works so hard, even on weekends, leaves home early and return home late, saving every possible dollar and cent but this won't go far. Even though you have a slight chance of being rich by doing this, but you don't get to enjoy life, what's the point?
The list goes on...
Tennis was fun, Kaiqing plays very well for a girl, I can safely say better than me! I ain't ashamed, because she has training. For me, I'm just edwin (jack) of all trades, and its more than enough for me. She had other friends too, which I met this 35year old guy, Joseph, whom we had a great conversation about life.
A role model for me, just that I want to be better than that because he told me I started out even younger than him. Except I wouldn't want to lose my hair that fast and also no plans to get married as of today. Which sparked another great topic to talk about, but won't be mentioned here.
I think people will pay to know about that side of me! Haha just joking...
Went to pick my mom and all the other aunties there. You had no idea how many times I had to call auntie! My uncle and aunt, which I have not seen in a while, treated us to lunch at Balestiar.
Monday 23/10:
For a moment, I was wondering whether if I was really not going to have work today. Everyone in my family gone to work, friends going to school, seems really very odd indeed. But of course it was a holiday in the end, and I enjoyed it.
Having such luxuries remind me of the 21.5days of leave I have saved, heh.
Sunday 22/10:
How can Ferrari lose...? All the best to hero Michael Schumacher in his retirement, looking forward to Kimi in the red car next season, how exciting!
I should really get the handphone I've been eyeing for, whenever my favourite cat cuddle up to me, you have no idea how much I cringe not having a camera to capture the moment. And also the moments where he would treat me coldly when his girl is around. Haha~ I understand, I so understand...
Hmmm I don't know what's going on, but I'll try my best as promised. Have I really been like that in the past? I dont recall at all... But it has been awhile.. I shall await your notice, no hurries...
Saturday 21/10:
On my way back from central, where my dad drove my sister and I to tm, parking in there to have lunch and do some grocery shopping, saw Xin Jia crossing the road. What a pleasant surprise indeed because her birthday is just around the corner.
Enjoyed Windtalkers, and realised I've been watching too many WWII shows recently... Behind Enemy Lines, Thin Red Line and Saving Private Ryans.
Friday 20/10:
Course barbeque at Wei Hong's house, well at least that's what I thought it was. Turned out to be catered food, lan gaming, gambling and more gambling. Think there was about 8-10 laptobs and 2 dens.
Great cohesion session, which should be done more often!
Thursday 19/10:
Had a great chat with Raymond. He said I was just like him a few months back, the point that I'm stuck in. But I won't want to be where he is now few months later.
Appreciate what he was trying to tell me, but my mind has been made up. Call it determined or stubborn but its decided.
What was I thinking in the first place, never should have done all that at all. Guess it was partly related to the events that happened and some of my friends but its over now. Thoughts all straightened out.
Just wanna apologise to you... But you won't know its you that I'm relating to... But when you realise, just know that its my fault and i'm truly sorry...
11:21 pm;